Have you ever relied upon someone for a sense of security, only to have the rug pulled from underneath you, leaving you rattled, confused & let down?
I am sharing this personal experience + teaching based off what I've learnt along the years and maybe this is the sign that you've been looking for if you're drawn to reading this. After many years of deep diving into personal and spiritual transformational work, I’ve come to find that the only person you can truly rely on for a sense of security stability and certainty, is YOURSELF.
Now some of you, might be thinking, 'well that’s sad' ha...but my point isn’t about ‘not’ creating deeply nourishing relationships and experiencing a sense of security stability and certainty with others HOWEVER, when we rely on the external world for such things, they can be taken away at any point (if you're deeply struggling with this, and want to dive deeper, let's chat) But, I want you to think of a time in your life for example maybe in a past relationship, where you relied on the other person for that sense of security, stability and certainty, and then one-day it was ripped from underneath you and essentially you fell on your butt - you've experience this right? Now, if that’s the only sense of security , stability and certainty that you’ve ever experienced (placing it solely in another person or within a relationship) you would’ve felt really lost, really unsafe, really uncertain and really unstable post-breakup. And the learning you may have gained from this, or what you may have become aware of is that the only person you can rely on is yourself and your ‘inner’ security, stability & certainty. So we have always experienced people things places and so on, that come and go. The only constant in life is change. So when you look at it from that perspective, you might start to wonder, well how will I ever feel secure, safe and certain in a world that’s ever-changing and constantly evolving? Well number one, I want you to think of how you are a part of nature. You are a multidimensional being who is always changing and evolving and growing. And we must learn to become comfortable with the ebb and the flow, the up in the down, the left to right and everything in between. And we must release the need to control, what we cannot control. But what we can control is the way we perceive our reality and how we wish to navigate through this ever-changing, ever evolving world. And the best way I’ve come to know how to do this, is by relying on myself soley for a sense of stability, security and certainty. Because no one can ever take that from me. So instead of relying on the external world that is always changing and that is constantly unpredictable and throwing a surprises, I trust that no matter what happens that I have my own back and that’s not going anywhere. And like I said, no one can take that away from me. No one can take that power that I hold, and that you hold within. And what tends to happen is that when you create this senses stability and so on within yourself, the external world seems to reflect that very quickly. And what I mean by that, is that for a long time I relied on other people to give this to me. And I had to go through so much shit and so many breakdown moments only to realise over and over again at the very lesson I was here to learn, was to source those feelings from within. And once I managed to cultivate this sense of stability, security and certainty within myself, essentially coming back home to myself in my personal power, I then attracted in relationships that felt more stable, secure and certain because that’s how I felt inside - hello law of attraction and aligned action. And let me tell you, the moment I felt like a relational container wasn’t, instead of projecting my pain outwards and blaming them expecting them to provide me with what I need, I was able to gift myself with exactly what I needed in that moment. Because the thing is, so many of my clients come to me feeling completely lost, like the rug has been pulled out from underneath them and they have no idea where to turn, and they feel like because they’ve relied on the external way to be a certain way and with that suddenly changing or shifting it sent them into a spiral downwards. And I’m here to remind them, and you, to turn inwards. So that when shit hits the fan, know that nothing's been taken away from you and that you have everything you need within you (I know that's cliche, but there are many tools and skills for transformation that can be used so that you can learn to give yourself what you need - like working with me - I can help you with this!) And so if you are going through this right now or you’ve gone through this in the past, or maybe this may come in handy for the future, I want you to reflect on what your relationships give you; whatever relationship that is whether it be family, friends, work colleagues or whoever else, and ask yourself the following question - How can I give this to myself so that I'm not constantly relying on another?
So that if, by any reason these people disappear from my life or vanish or fade away which by the way is a natural part of life, that your identity, you’re worth, your power, your security, your stability and your certainty doesn’t go away with it!
Because deep down in your bones, in your body, you know that you hold these gifts within you. So to just repeat this one more time, I’m not saying never to rely on people ever again or that desiring to create a relational container of security, stability & certainty…but I am saying that it would be wise to start to ponder and understand that life is constantly evolving changing and growing, and so are you, which means so is the rest of humanity. And we need to know and affirm to ourselves that no matter what happens we will always have our own back, to be our own biggest cheerleaders, to use ourselves as inspiration, despite what happens in the external world around us! Well that's a wrap, and one of the biggest lessons I've ever learnt so I hope it's provided you with some clarity around security, stability and certainty. If you've read this email and you're like ‘yep I get it, but I want the tools and skills for how to give these needs to myself' and if you want help navigating through this topic, that's what I'm here for and that's what I am SO SO passionate about it because I've experienced it!
You can book one of two things: 1 - Psychic Mediumship Reading (this is great for expanding self awareness and gifting you from spirit with guidance and clarity as to how you can move forward. Click Here To Book A Reading. 2- Speak w/Me 1:1 if you're keen to dive deeper and explore all the ways I can help you unravel your trauma and pain and to help you embody your most powerful, confident & intuitive self! Click Here To Book A Chat With Me.
With love, Alicia Michelle xo
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